Monday, May 07, 2007

Ol' Webslinger

I was a total comics junkie as a kid/early teenager (Marvel, not DC), so when Ferg and JD said they wanted to go see Spiderman 3, I was all over it. Naturally, we calculated the best time (ie when all of us could get our act together) to avoid small children and went with the 7:30 show. We got there in plenty of time to secure our tickets and then go get some grub at California Pizza Kitchen.

Now, I'm a big believer that a good movie is indicative of two things. The first is the amount of times you check your watch. Checking your watch means that you want to know what time it is and calculate how much time is left in the flick - all in all, not a good sign. The second is if I would suggest the movie to a dear friend (no colleagues or co-workers, just dear friends). So, how did Spider-Man rate according to the Arman tests? Well, I never checked the time so it certainly kept my attention. And, I would totally tell someone to see it if they're a fan of the first two films and/or the comic book and/or a good action flick. So, at the end of the day I guess you could say it was pretty good.

Most of my problems with it were relatively the same with the first two of the franchise and that includes: after stripping away the rush of the action sequences, the storyline is totally Velveeta, just cheese for days. And, not even good cheese - a block of room temperature cheese product. And, of course, the mass market appeal of the audience it's gonna draw in, all of which are my biggest pet peeves with going to the movies:
-Crying babies (cute, but get a fucking babysitter)
-Late arrivals that ask you to scoot down (other people do exist aside from yourself and your three friends)
-Cell phones ringing (there were how many polite commercials asking you to turn your shit off)
-Loud Q&As between the in the know and novice movie watchers (it's Spiderman, seriously, it's not quantum physics)

I'm so glad we had cocktails first, but damn you CPK for your lack of Jaeger.

2 comments:

Ferg said...

Ah, I asked you how a man made of sand can cry? Loved the answer, "it's glass honey."

Shawn said...

ok so i can now comment on this comment because i have seen the movie.....when green lantern jr hit that sandy bastard with some heat...that part turned to glass and with a nice whack...it shattered...it would take an internal heat source in his occipital glands to create glass tears..which would make no sense at all because then his eyes would crust up and he wouldn't be able to see...and it couldn't be water because then that bitch would turn to some form of mud.....endless confusion...however when peter bitch slapped mary jane rotten crotch something amazing happened....you know that moment when you have word vomit and it winds up falling at the exact moment of silence that can make or break you if you say the right or wrong thing...well...i had anothr "are you fucking kidding me" moment....when the bitch hit the floor i blabbed out " now go make me a sandwich bitch"....the other 7 people in the theater almost fell out of their chairs.....priceless