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Have you ever lost everything? Well, I now know what it kind of feels like. My computer crashed a few days ago. The hard drive had zeroed out – so not cute. All of my music was gone. That’s fine. It can be replaced.

All of my work is another thing. It was all gone. All of my short stories, past columns, my book; nothing but memories now. It’s kind of depressing. Please spare me the lectures on “backing up.” I have all the seasons of Sex and the City on DVD, I’ve seen the episode; I should have heeded its advice.

I have most of my columns in the form of the issues they appeared in and the short stories and book can be rebuilt, perhaps better than their predecessors. I just have to rely on the brain, but even that is at the mercy of all the designer drug use in the mid 90’s.

Come to think of it, maybe this was my computer’s moment of clarity. Maybe my hard drive is an extension of my own personae and thought process and this is its way of telling me to be more ambitious, to forget the past and start anew. Perhaps this is my cue to think on a bigger scale.

Yeah, I know, I know, I should have backed up.