From Ear To Ear

I think one of the best feelings ever is when someone you're totally smitten with says "I can't wait to see you."

I've just been grinning like the proverbial village idiot for the past couple of days.

I have a major event tonight with Veronica and Alex Lauterstein. Said someone showed up at sound check just to be supportive.

I'm going to try and not think too much about it. My dear friend DK told me to just allow myself to enjoy it. I think that's the best bit of advice I've gotten in a while.

Yeah, this is an edit of an edit. I was just steady listing out the characteristics I find totally endearing and charming about him and stopped myself. I think that's borderline pandering. I wonder if my friends are finding it annoying yet. You know what - they'll be strong - as many times as I've listened to their faux and real relationship problems. And, yes, I'm keeping score. I've been single for a few years now - I'm good until at least 2012.

Dear Anonymous Commenter

Suck it.

And The Award for Most Dramatic E-Mail Goes To... EDIT

If there's something I've learned about human nature, it's that sometimes it's impossible to get people to be objective. I'm not saying I'm better than everyone else is at being objective, but with me in particular it's built in with the writer's background and the over-analytical Pisces thing.

You know how sometimes you're having a discussion or debate with a person and instead of listening and processing what you're saying that they're just gearing up with what they're going to say next and waiting for his or her next opportunity to speak? It's something I lock into when discussing anything with anyone and when ever that situation comes up, I simply just stop communicating all together. There's just no point to it. You're literally wasting your breath. The only thing worse than that is if that person actually listens to what you're saying and then shrugs it off with a blatant disregard. There's NOTHING more frustrating.

So, what happens when that person is a close friend? You have to make a choice. Do you appease that person in lieu of your own feelings? Or, do you defend yourself? How do you defend yourself when they're not even listening? I mean, are you supposed to stand there and smile like the village idiot? If that's what you're expecting from me, you've got another thing coming.

Yeah, I know there are a lot of questions in this single post, but it's where I'm at right now. I could bore you guys with the details, but those are irrelevant. This is about a difference of opinion, the reaction to that opinion and a classic Catch 22. Nothing good will come of this. Well, this ain't the first time...

Aloha Pwaulie

One of my favorite people and adopted nephew, Pwaulie hit it to Hawaii last week to pursue a degree in Marine Biology.

I give him all the props in the world because it's f'n hard to pull yourself up from routine, friends and family. Not to mention, moving a couple of time zones away. And, he did it himself. That's pretty brilliant for a 20-something in my opinion.

Any who, he requested that no one tells him "I Miss You" since it's hard enough as it is. I get it. I replaced it with "get to work."

He has decided to start writing a blog which you can find to the right of reading my own blog - see it? Right there. "Aloha Pwaulie." Granted that's not the real name of it, but he's my nephew so I edited to my liking.

Get to work, Pwaulie.

You Don't Listen To Me While I Talk To The Wall

Ok, so occasionally my iTunes random play puts on a song I've nearly forgotten about. Today, it was Snow Patrol's "How To Be Dead."

I love this song for many reasons, but mostly because it totally captures the frustration of a relationship taking a nosedive.

You know how sometimes when you're in a "discussion" with someone and instead of listening to what you're saying and processing your point of view, they're thinking of what they're going to say next?

And then, you add that element of a completely irrational emotion like love?

Yeah, this song captures all of that tomfoolery.

Snow Patrol "How To Be Dead"

Something Old, Something New

Someone To Stop The Beat

In the past couple of weeks, two songs on my iTunes have risen in the ranks of my "Most Played."

The first one is "You Can't Stop the Beat" from Hairspray. Yeah, I wish I could explain this one, but I'm sworn to secrecy.

The other one is Veronica's "Someone To Hold," which, to be fair, has always been a guilty pleasure.

For the record, both songs are work related, but the former of the two I can go the rest of my life without hearing again.

Sunday Mass Gets X-Rated

The team and I have been working on a project for the past couple of weeks and it's officially moving forward.

We had the daunting task of re-creating Charlie Brown's X-Rated Cabaret. That's right, the Ultimate Bitch is back in Midtown. Every Sunday. Starting Feb 01.

The All-New Cast revealed soon, I swear...

ADDENDUM:

Since the cat is already out of the proverbial bag:

Charlie Brown's All New X-Rated Cabaret
Finally, the BITCH is back in Midtown

Featuring:
The Queen of Comedy - Alexandria Martin
The Style, The Grace, The Beautiful Face - Ashley Kruiz
The Goddess of Seduction - Bianca Nicole
The Diva - Cezanne
The Queen of Innovation - Jade Daniels
Atlanta's Las Vegas Showgirl - Jazelle
Imagination in Motion - Jordan Kennedy
The Notorious - Nicole Paige Brooks
The Dancing Diva - Shawnna Brooks

Details Coming Soon!

Tell Me Lies, Tell Me Sweet Little Lies

So, me and one of my best mates, BH were trading e-mails this morning while he waited for his flight back to Atlanta.

We touched on the topic of euphemisms and sugar coating. (Don't ask how, our conversations, whether real time or viral always take on a mind of their own.) Here are the best ones that either he or I may or may not use on a regular basis and/or heard from another party:

"I experimented in high school."

"I've never done this before, go slow."

"No, of course this won't make you gay."

"Don't worry, I won't tell anyone."

"I'll just stick the head in, it won't hurt."

"I'll be right back, you gonna be here?"

"I had no idea he had a boyfriend."

"I promise to be good while you're gone."

"I have a good explanation."

"I thought you were awake."

"I've got a meeting really early in the morning."

"I was really drunk."

"I'll call you later, ok?"

Played Myself Lovely

For some reason, I thought things would be easier to manage after the New Year. Yeah, I totally set myself up on that one.

Things are busier than before, which is good. However, this chest cold/congestion thing I've been dealing with has made me slow. Me no likey.

Oh, here's the cool thing of the week so far - so, my boss is the Tour Manager for a certain pop princess. He called me last night asking me to find some things for the tour - a circus tent, jugglers, contortionists, fire breathers, stilt walkers and midgets.

Shit makes me chuckle - I mean who gets to book this stuff and rightfully call it "work." Oh yeah, me.

I also got to make the "reservation of life" while said pop princess is in town. Yeah, I get to go to dinner with them. Hee. Suck on that all you queens bragging about what seat you got. Mine is going to be across the table from her - now say something.

Cautiously Optimistic

It's officially been 2009 for three days and I'm still catching up from the Holidays.

The New Year's event went great - everything was executed to perfection. I heart my team and have a very special place in my heart for Chad and Kristine. Now, although attendance wasn't where we wanted it to be, there were some very important figures that showed up. And, based on the execution of the event - they're all about the future of Navigation. So, SCORE!

In other news, met a cutie. We went on a date last night. Yeah, a real date - you know, one of those things i haven't been on in FOREVER. It was a lot of great conversation, a couple of drinks, nothing more than a good night kiss. Like all things, there are certain complications, but no deal breakers. Here's a hint - he already compared us to Real World New Orleans. That shit still makes me chuckle.

Happy New Year, boys and girls! I've got a good feeling about this one.

Tick Tock Tick Tock

So, I have to leave tomorrow for family incarceration. Don't get me wrong, I don't mind hanging out with my Mommy. Or my sister-in-law, Heather, but the rest of the family can be overwhelming. I don't know if it's residual animosity from adolescence, but there's always an argument brewing before I even step foot through the door.

Usually, the brothers can get me to play some War game on their XBOX (usually cause they need another player to complete the "mission") but I ALWAYS suck at it. I like my shoot em' up games a little more simple - shoot to the outside of the screen to reload, shoot the little weapon icon to switch from handgun to shotgun to machine gun, but their shit is soooo complicated. They got me pushing all these crazy buttons and I always end up going through my five "lives" within seconds it seems. Yeah, that's pretty much the extent of the brotherly bonding.

Ok, well, I'm dead now, I think I'll head into the kitchen and bake a cake or arrange something.

But, I digress, I've got so much to do, but so little time. My crux is that I've got a major event on the horizon in NYE, but I'm obligated to the family. I've said it before and I stand by it, families are a hierarchy, you drop whatever you're doing when you're summoned. It's not that I don't trust the team, they know how I like things and don't doubt their abilities, it's just NYE is hardly the time to put those abilities to a test.

Thank f'n GOD for Wi-Fi and my BlackBerry, that's all I'm saying.

Oh, Balls...

Next week is Christmas.

Where the f*ck did December go?

My NYE Campaign

She's so pretty that Kristine W. And, I can't lie, if I wasn't repping Chad, I'd totally be his groupie.

Beat Down By Trannies and Queens

So, last night, the girls came over to my place for "Game Night" which, last night, consisted of pizza and Uno of Death (actually "Uno Attack" but it gets rowdy around here). You see, with Uno of Death, there's a little machine that replaces the traditional "Draw 2" or "Draw 4" cards. The mechanism actually has a button that spits out cards in random quantities and sometimes not at all.

Yeah, I got my ass handed to me by NPB, Alexandria and Bianca. I had the unfortunate placement of having to go after either Alexandria or Bianca and I paid the price EVERY turn, not to mention, Alexandria cheats. She was steady announcing everyone's hands if they were careless with their hand placement and her line of vision. Luckily, NPB was far enough away in the rotation that I couldn't hurt her and vice versa.

Hell, I didn't even win a round until near the very end. Every other round, I had like six to ten cards left in my hand. It was a sad state of affairs.

Next week, we're playing Sorry of Death. Get ready whores.

See, THIS is why I can never own an XBOX or Wii.

Stuff I'm Working On...

I haven't always been the biggest fan, but I'm curious about the pageantry of it all.

Yeah, I said it. Say something...

TOY PARTY!

It's this Sunday - if you want to keep your soul, you'll attend.

Yesterday, RB and I popped into Target to buy the toys for the Navigation crew.

Honestly, we had more fun than we should have - and, true to form, we bought toys that we would want to keep for ourselves.

I found myself wanting to buy the classic EZ Bake Oven just because I wanted one as a child.

RB looked at me and thoughtfully pointed out that we probably shouldn't buy anything that requires purchasing of more stuff: batteries, EZ Bake Batter Mix, etc.

This reminded me of a few years back when I went to Toy Party with Brad Williams. He was like "where's your toy?" I smiled and proudly took out two DVDs from my jacket pocket "Elf" and "Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory."

He goes, "those are cute and all, but umm, these kids are poor. What makes you think they have DVD players?"

Huh. Hmm. (Sigh.)

New Campaign

To be honest, as far as performers go, the outcome was never really in question. ATL just loves them some...

F'n Pay Attention

So, yesterday Bianca and Eric came over for leftover lunchy goodness. I absentmindedly threw the squash casserole in the oven while I modified other leftover ingredients into a nice fried rice side dish. The fried rice came out stellar, as did the nuked up turkey, ham, stew and stuffing.

Yeah, when I went to check on the squash, I was greeted by the lovely smell of melted plastic. Really? Did I throw it in there without taking the tupperware cover off of it?

F'n idiot.

Hope the homeless don't mind picking plastic out of their squash when they go through the garbage.

BTW, my place looks like a f'n speakeasy now. I have all this alcohol everyone left over from Thanksgiving. And, for the record, nothing is more fun than a bunch of friends playing drunken Uno of Death. I will concede to Alexandria though, she IS the Uno queen. For now.

(Sigh) Sorry Y'all...

My blogging is contingent on:

A) Time constraints - the busier I am, the less I even think about me blog
B) Inspiration - when I find things interesting, stressing or funny as fuck, I use this space as my therapy.

Lately, my updates have tapered off because of A.

However, here's a list of things I've been up to:
-NYE - shit's gonna be good y'all
-Mommy's feeling better!!!
-Twilight - just obsessed
-Flirting with CC, just thumpa thumpa
-Talking shit with MH (he's f'n awesome)
-Dinner with Ultra, good times - met Chris Willis of David Guetta vocalist fame, I may just love him
-Circus Tour
-Sending KW to Bangkok

I'd promise for details later, but we all know that shit ain't gonna happen.

Happy Trannies and Toddies Thanksgiving, y'all!